Do you ever have days where you’re feeling absolutely great and then the very next day loneliness just creeps in and hits you like a tidal wave and you’re not even sure why? Or perhaps you’ve been carrying loneliness by your side like a security blanket and wondering why you feel so heavy inside?
I’ve had days where I’ve felt lonely when I’m by myself and even when I’m around others. The feeling still feels the same no matter the company or lack thereof. Sometimes it can be from putting too much expectation or energy into others’ company so when they leave the emptiness is stronger. Sometimes it can be from the uncomfortable feeling of being on your own when you’re so used to being surrounded by constant people and stimulation. When those things disappear, even for a moment, the void can feel so much greater when you’re not used to spending time on your own.
Loneliness can also be from just missing someone or something deeply. Whatever the reasons are behind the feeling, the following 9 tips will help you get through these lonely spells and also help you uncover and discover the beautiful gifts that can come with this vacant time you have.
Take a break from social media
Social media is an amazing tool, but too much of it can leave negative impacts on our productivity, mental health and wellbeing. Social media platforms are designed to keep you addicted. They’re designed to pull you in and keep you coming back for more and more. They fill the void of boredom and anytime you need a distraction, Filling these empty spaces with distractions like social media prevents us from enjoying and seeing the gift that those spaces bring us.
Taking a break from social media can be good for your metal health too. We can get into the trap of comparing ourselves to others which can lead to feelings of sadness and depression. It’s healthier to use that energy on our own vessel. On our own healing, creativity and self-development.
Do something special for yourself
Be kind to yourself. Do something so special for yourself you’ll feel like you’re almost dating yourself. Buy yourself flowers. Treat yourself to a massage or go to your favorite park and soak up the sunshine. Go for a leisurely walk or bike ride. Act like a tourist in your city and go to a museum or take a fun one night art or cooking class. Sit at a cozy cafe with a warm drink and read a few chapters from a good book.
Taking time to slow down and just enjoy time with yourself, you will start to not only learn more about yourself, but fall in love with yourself. Appreciating your own company will help ease the discomfort of being alone and help you appreciate the freedom that comes with doing things solo as well as the beautiful journey of self-discovery.
Call a friend or write them a letter
When you are feeling lonely and missing someone or just the company of people sometimes writing a letter to them or giving that friend or loved one a call can really brighten your day as well as there’s. You can share with them just how much they mean to you and how much you appreciate them.
Oftentimes we can get so caught up in our day to day lives that we forget to share how much someone is appreciated and loved in our lives. Taking the time to communicate with someone through either hand written letters or phone conversations can help nourish our souls when we’re really missing someone and cannot be with them. Letting them know how much they are loved and appreciated will also help nourish your relationships.
Visit an animal shelter
Animals are truly therapeutic and healing. If you do not have any furry friends at home you can still receive the benefits by visiting an animal shelter. When feeling lonely, animals can provide that emotional support to help us through those difficult times. It’s especially beneficial if you can hug them, cuddle them and let them love on you.
Get some vitamin D
Do you ever notice how your mood just elevates when you get a taste of sunshine? Sunshine has so many benefits, but it can be especially beneficial when feeling low or lonely. Letting the warmth hit your skin, breathe in the fresh air and speak gratitude into your day. Just a little bit of the sun rays can go a long way and even on days when it is not fully sunny outside, even getting fresh air and being in nature will help fill you up.
Take a walk in nature
Just like getting sunshine on your skin can help elevate your mood and bring you back to center, so can taking a walk in nature. You may think how can taking a walk in nature really help with my loneliness? It can be a time to help unload all your thoughts swirling in your mind. Take the time to just breathe in the clean air and admire all the beauty around you and not fill those empty spaces with distractions.
You’ll begin to notice those creative downloads begin to ignite. Nature is also very therapeutic and soothing to the soul. It’s like a resting place for any negative thinking or energy. Sometimes when we are stuck inside for too long, especially by yourself, you can get stuck in negative loops. Changing the environment, especially to something as therapeutic as nature can help turn that negative energy into something positive and help you feel rejuvenated again.
Laughter is the best medicine
I’m sure you’ve heard this one before, but that’s because it’s true! Laughter truly is the best medicine especially during times of loneliness. You can go to a comedy club, watch a funny movie or show… read something humorous or create something that makes you laugh.
The act of smiling and laughing can turn around any sad mood. It is also very healing and therapeutic to release energy in this way. So the next time you have lonely thoughts creep in, give yourself the gift of laughter and enjoy life even if it’s in your own company.
Take time for creativity
Finding creative inspiration can be hard, but it can be easier when we eliminate distractions and just sit with ourselves. It is oftentimes even easier to get into a flow state when we are lost in our inner worlds and there is nothing to take away from our time and attention. You can use this opportunity of being with yourself to rediscover or develop deeper levels of your creative side. Being creative, using any modality that speaks to your soul can also be very therapeutic when feeling lonely. You can channel any thoughts and emotions that come up into your creative endeavors to make something truly beautiful and inspiring.
Use this opportunity to find yourself
Sometimes instead of filling this empty void with trying to seek out stimulation and company, you can instead use this time to discover and learn more about yourself. Use this time to really find who it is you really are. Your passions, your likes and dislikes, your talents, and all the things that make you so special and unique. You are constantly evolving and changing and the evolution of your passions, purpose, likes and dislikes may change overtime and that’s ok.
Taking time to rediscover yourself will help you understand more what truly fills your cup and makes you feel fulfilled. Knowing yourself more and feeling more connected to who you really are will beautify all other relationships in your lives. Deeper connection with yourself will create deeper connections with others so when you finally are in others’ company again you will feel nourished on a much deeper level.
Final Thoughts
Feelings of loneliness can come and go like the seasons. The feeling itself does not define you, but you can remember that even with a negative feeling like loneliness you can turn it into a positive. You can find ways to connect deeper with yourself, discover yourself and develop a more meaningful relationship with oneself.
All this in turn will benefit and help nourish and flourish the relationships you develop outside yourself. So that the next time you do connect with others, it’s coming from an authentic and secure place. It will also help you value the time you do share with others and intentionally work on being more present to really hold onto those moments you share and keep those memories.
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