There are so many times when life feels too overwhelming; when we seem to face failure after failure with no end in sight. You keep trying to pick yourself up after repeatedly falling down. You wonder when there will be a break, or when will there be some reprieve from the constant struggle life seems to throw at you. Please know that you are not alone, nor should you suffer alone.
There have been so many times in my own experiences when life seems all too overwhelming. I’ve fallen on such hard times and faced financial hardships so great, I had to go to the food bank to even afford food for my family. I’ve been brought to my knees from the pain of psychological abuse, and of my own inner turmoil of anxiety and depression.
I’ve struggled with suicidal ideation during some of my darkest times. Something inside me always told me to hang on and not give up. In times when you have felt great pain; in times when life just feels too overwhelming and heavy, please remember to hang on and not give up. There is a great, beautiful and bright future yet to blossom for you.
The following 5 essential steps below will help guide you to find strength in times when you feel defeated.
You are not alone
First and foremost, you must remember you are not alone, nor should you suffer alone and in silence. There are so many others suffering quietly and battling hardships on their own, behind what may be portrayed on the surface. Sometimes, the battles we face can feel so much greater when we think we are alone. Remember that you are not alone and that there are so many others either fighting similar battles who can empathize and relate to you.
If you need someone to talk to, reach out to a good friend or loved one. Talk to a therapist or seek out support through an online support group. Lean on others in these times of need. It is important for your mental health and helps your burdens feel less heavy.
In remembering that we are all in this together, and fighting our own battles, please always remember to be kind and spread kindness to others whenever you can. You never know what bringing a smile to another’s face may do for someone, even shaping their whole day or even life.
Remember your why
Remembering your “why” can give you the strength you need to get through some of life’s greatest hurdles. You may ask, how do I know what my “why” is and what is the purpose of finding one? Your “why” is your deepest source of passion. It is your reason for being. What you are willing to fight for against all odds. What you deeply love. Your “why” could be for your children, your art, your loved ones, your furry pets, your purpose in life, your career, your soul’s calling.
To find your “why” you must look deep within and listen to that which tugs at your heart strings; something so strong that you know you would do absolutely anything for them or that state of being. The first step is to discover what your deep “why” is and holding onto it like it’s the most precious thing on this Earth. Such strength in your “why” once you discover it, will make you unshakeable in life’s most turbulent waters.
Be gentle with yourself
During times of immense stress and burdens, you can be hard on yourself for not doing or being more to everyone and everything. However, it is impossible to be everything to everyone and everything all the time, even during the good times. So, be gentle with yourself and know that you are enough and you are doing enough.
Talk kindly to yourself. Tell yourself that you are doing the very best you can at this moment. If all you have to give is 40% and you give 40%, then you have given 100%. Do not judge yourself for the capacity you have to give in moments of stress and overwhelm. I promise you are doing more than enough. It is also most important to put any extra energy you have into yourself right now. Put yourself first and take time to do the things that fill you up. You are worthy and you are worth it.
Prioritize yourself and your mental health
When you are faced with some of life’s greatest challenges and hurdles, it’s during these times that it is most important to prioritize yourself and your mental health. What does this mean or look like?
This means shutting off your phone or taking a break from social media and the news. This means hiring a babysitter for a few hours, so you can have some time for yourself. This means setting aside time in your day to take a bath or take a walk in nature. This means taking time to do something that fills up your cup and brings you happiness.
It could be cuddling up with some hot tea and a good book or going to your favorite coffee spot and browsing the cute stores nearby. It means doing something just for you and releasing any guilt you may hold around it. It means saying “no” to some things or people. It means taking a mental health day from work. It means scheduling in a day just for yourself or even just a few hours or moments if that’s all you have.
As you carve out this time for yourself and prioritize your needs, the easier it will become to set those boundaries. You will find that the more you fill up your cup first the more balanced your life becomes. For you were always meant to fill your own cup first. Inevitably, everyone else’s needs will always get met, but when you fill yourself up first you come from a full reservoir, instead of an empty one.
Remember, this too shall pass
I’m sure you have heard these words uttered before, “this too shall pass”. But it is worth letting it sink in. Every moment we live passes quicker than we realize. It’s just during the most challenging times in our lives that life somehow seems to slow down. So, remind yourself in those times that this too shall pass and it will give you the strength to get through it.
No moment lasts forever, even the most painful ones. For every valley in life you face, there will always be mountain peaks yet to come. Have gratitude for those good times, and cherish those moments, because you will face more hard times. That is just a part of life. Learning how to appreciate and cherish the good times more and keeping faith through the hard times will build strength and resilience in your character.
Final Thoughts
Life is not easy, for anyone. And I understand that sometimes life can throw you some pretty heavy burdens. In those moments, please do not let yourself sink because you were too afraid to ask for help or to lean on others. Please remember to prioritize yourself and your mental health. Take whatever time you need to rest and do things that fill up your cup. Always remember to be kind and gentle with yourself. You are doing more than enough. You are enough.
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